Originally posted elsewhere.
Moved to here for archival purposes:
ha haha hahaha Ha Ha HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AHHHHHHHHH
(fuck my life...)
whew
whew
whew
HA...HA...HI EVERYBODY!!!
IT'S BEEN A HELL OF A YEAR THIS PAST WEEK, HUH?!?
LET'S REVIEW:
MONDAY: I WENT BACK TO WORK AFTER SPENDING THE PAST TWO MONTHS AT HOME WITH MY KIDS, HOME-SCHOOLING THEM. ALSO, I POSTED SIX MORE PAGES FROM HIGH SOCIETY! WEREN'T THEY FUNNY?!?
TUESDAY: I POSTED A FAX FROM DAVE AND STUFF FROM TWITTER AND STUFF!
WEDNESDAY: I DIDN'T POST NOTHING SINCE I LET HOBBS POST STUFF WEDNESDAYS...
THURSDAY: WAS MY BIRTHDAY. I TURNED 41! AFTER WORK MY KIDS SURPRISED ME WHEN I GOT HOME WITH BALLOONS AND THE WIFE BOUGHT ICE CREAM CAKE! IT WAS GREAT!!!
FRIDAY: DAVE HAD AN UPDATE! MICHAEL R. OF EASTON, PENNSYLVANIA WON A MAJOR AWARD! AND THEN OVER ON THE FACEBOOKS, DAN "N." ASKED FOR A DIGITAL COPY OF THE CEREBUS MISCELLANY. AND I THOUGHT "GEE MATT, YOU GOT COPIES OF ALL THAT STUFF, SO WHY DON'T YOU MAKE IT?!?" SO I DID. OR AT LEAST, I STARTED TO...I STAYED UP UNTIL TWO IN THE MORNING WORKING ON IT!!!
SATURDAY: BECAUSE I WAS FEVERISHLY WORKING ON THE MISCELLANY THING, I WANTED A REAL QUICK POST SO I COULD WORK THAT! (ESPECIALLY SINCE I KNEW OLIVER'S EMAIL FOR HIS POST WOULD BE A'COMIN', AND I WANTED TO BE READY FOR THAT. SO I RAN THE LATEST FROM JOHNNY MCPHANBOT AND DAVE! AND THEN I GOT DAVE/EDDIE'S MESSAGES ABOUT SDOAR, SO I POSTED THEM! BECAUSE I KNEW I DIDN'T WANT TO SKIP OLIVER'S POST, AND THAT THE SDOAR THING WAS IMPORTANT ENOUGH THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO PUSH IT OFF UNTIL MONDAY! WHICH IS TODAY! BUT ANYWAY, I THEN STAYED UP UNTIL MIDNIGHT WORKING ON THE STUPID MISCELLANY THING...WHICH HAHA IT TURNS OUT HAHA BRENDAN H. (WHO REALLY DOESN'T LIKE "RON ESSLER"...) ALREADY HAHA MADE ONE. SO IF YOU NEED A HAHA DIGITAL COPY, THERE YA GO PAL! I GOT YOU BACKS!!! HA!
SUNDAY: I GOT UP AND WORKED ON THE MISCELLANY THING FOR AWHILE, THEN I DID OLIVER'S POST! IT'S ALWAYS FUN FORMATTING ALL THOSE PHOTOS, AND COPYING THE LINKS AND PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER!!! SO! MUCH! FUN!!! THEN CARSON SENT ME A MESSAGE, SAYING HE HAD A POST READY AND I COULD POST IT WHENEVER I WANTED! SO, BECAUSE I WAS BUSY WORKING ON THE MISCELLANY THING, I DIDN'T READ IT, SINCE IT WASN'T GOING UP UNTIL TODAY AT THE EARLIEST ANYWAY! AND THEN I STARTED GETTING EMAILS ABOUT THE COMMENTS ON CARSON'S POST! BECAUSE HAHA HE HAD EDITED IT AND ACCIDENTALLY POSTED IT! OH WELL! THESE THINGS HAPPEN! NOBODY'S FAULT... I ALSO DECIDED THAT SEAN ROBINSON WAS RIGHT WHEN HE TOLD ME THAT HE THOUGHT THE MISCELLANY IDEA I WAS WORKING ON WAS A BAD IDEA. AND THAT THE BEST THING IS TO THROW OUT THE TWO HUNDRED AND NINETY PAGE DOCUMENT I HAD SPENT THE PAST TWO DAYS WORKING ON AND START OVER FROM SCRATCH!!! (DON'T WORRY, MY VERSION WAS VERY CLOSE TO BRENDAN'S, SO NO BIG LOSS. AT ALL! HAHAHA!!!)
MONDAY: HEY!!! THAT'S TODAY!!! AND SINCE I'M BACK WORKING I WAS MENTALLY WRITING A POST FOR TODAY, THAT INCLUDED THE FAX DAVE SENT ME THIS MORNING:
AND WHEN I CHECKED MY PHONE AT BREAK HAHA I SAW EMAILS OF COMMENTS FROM CARSON'S POST TODAY... HA HA HA HA!
SO HERE WE ARE!!!!!
EVERYTHING'S GREAT! RIGHT?!?
JUST. PEACHY.
PEACHY!!!
NEXT TIME: OH WHO THE @#$% KNOWS ANYMORE!?!?!?!
The OFFICIAL Mouse Skull Entertainment Blog
Monday, June 15, 2020
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
So, about that Election thingy...
Now that the election is over I feel I can bring this up in an apolitical way.
One of the big "points" to the Presidential Election was Mitt Romney's stance on abortion.
Again and again we were hit with ads from Barack Obama and his supporters that Romney wanted to outlaw all abortions...even in the cases of Rape, Incest, or When the Mother's Life Is At Risk.
And then we got hit with ads from Romney and his ilk that said basically, "No no no! Mitt Romney is against abortion EXCEPT in the cases of Rape, Incest, or When the Mother's Life Is At Risk."
Now, to be absolutely clear here: I AM A MALE. I DO NOT HAVE A UTERUS OR ACCOMPANYING FEMALE GENITALIA. Which means that any thoughts or opinions I have about the topic of abortion are my own and are not to be taken as advocacy for any political: view, party or agency.
Now, as I understand it, one of the big objections to abortions is that people don't want abortion to be used as birth control. Meaning that instead of the pill or condoms or what have you, a woman has indiscriminate sex and just goes for a trip to the abortion clinic if she gets pregnant. I can see the point. It sounds like a logical argument to me. Abortion NOT being a primary form of birth control? Not a problem for me. (Ya know, as a concept. As I said, no uterus. Getting an abortion isn't something I have to worry about.)
So here's my thing. I'm Not Pro-Life. I'm also not Pro-Choice. If I'm anything, I'm Pro-Language. And both the charge against Romney and his campaign's response have some Bad. @#*!ing. Language.
There seem to be three (3) categories of abortions that are to be considered "okay". 1) Rape. 2) Incest. 3) When the Mother's Life Is At Risk. Pro-whatever, those three situations are times when an abortion is "alright" (Ya know, in general. There are always the Pro-Life fanatics who say, "No Abortions Ever" but I'm just dealing with the Moderates and the "Choice" crowd.)
So, let's take a look at those three categories.
1) Rape. Now I think all reasonable peoples will agree that any woman who has had Unconsensual Sex That Results In Pregnancy should be allowed to get an abortion. Actually, I think all reasonable people would agree that any woman who has had Unconsensual Sex That Results In Pregnancy should get therapy, a hug and a cookie. Maybe two hugs... Rape is Bad. Let me say that again, Rape is Bad. One more time, for the people in the cheap seats, RAPE IS BAD! Nobody should EVER be forced to have Unconsensual Sex. Ever. And in the unfortunate case where a woman is forced to have Unconsensual Sex That Results In Pregnancy, I think forcing her to carry to term and then deliver a child that she had no choice in conceiving is pretty @#*!ing Evil. Just about as Evil as forcing the conception in the first place.
So you get raped, you get knocked up, you wanna abort? No problem.
2) Incest...let me get back to you.
3) When the Mother's Life Is At Risk. This one is, in my view, another "no-brainer." Kid'll live but Mom is toast? Again, I think all reasonable peoples would agree that forcing a woman to basically commit suicide for the sake of her unborn child is Evil. It's a tragedy to be sure. Another one of those therapy, a hug and a cookie situations. But another instance where a woman should be allowed to have an abortion.
So to recap: abortions for Rape victims and for When the Mother's Life Is At Risk. Perfectly reasonable. Perfectly logical.
And that brings me back to:
2) Incest. See...here's my problem. We've already established that Rape means you can get an abortion. It doesn't matter WHO commits the Rape. If a woman is Raped, she can have the abortion. Right? We're all on the same page?
So why is Incest on the list?
I mean I understand that Incest is wrong. Check that, Wrong. But if we accept the premise that abortion shouldn't be used as birth control, and we ALSO accept the premise that Unconsensual Sex That Results In Pregnancy (Rape,) is a situation where an abortion is tolerable, then why are we talking about Incest?
Rape is already on the list. A woman gets Raped by her father, it's still Rape. (And Wrong.) So any pregnancy that resulted is covered. Why specifically call out pregnancies that are the result of close blood relatives getting it on?
A woman has sex with her brother. She's not Raped by her brother. She CHOOSES to have sexual intercourse with her male sibling. She gets knocked up. Why is her abortion okay? The lady down the street who slept with some random (non-relative) guy and got pregnant (which won't kill her,) can't get an abortion.
(Presuming that either the Supreme Court overturns Roe V. Wade, or a new law is passed that the only abortions that are acceptable are the Romney Trilogy of: Rape, Incest, or When the Mother's Life Is At Risk.)
I mean if we (as a society) say "That the only choice when it comes to abortion is choose a different form of birth control or choose not to have sex." Why is there a special group that gets to choose to have sex and still gets abortions?
WTF?
That makes NO sense to me. "We're gonna make it so that only a tiny unfortunate minority of women can have abortions, oh and the kinky freaks." Where's the logic?
If a woman CHOOSES to have sex with a close blood relative and her pill didn't work, or the condom broke, or their "rhythm" was off, or whatever... why should she get access to an abortion when another woman who had the same incident with a Non-relative can't?
I just don't get it.
I mean, sure, a woman is the unfortunate victim of an incestuous Rape. She gets knocked up. Yeah, I think she should have no trouble getting an abortion. Because she was RAPED. Not because it was Incest. WHO Raped her shouldn't come into it. Rape is Wrong and no woman should be forced to have the kid. But don't tell me that "we're gonna eliminate abortion as birth control" and then say "unless you and your relative choose to get nasty."
Bull$&*^!
Unless... Are we FORCING the women who choose to bang their uncles to get abortions?
I mean that...that... What the @#*!
I mean if you take it as a fundamental principle that abortions are bad things that should only happen in extreme circumstances, to then say that one of those circumstances is a time when the woman getting the abortion doesn't get to choose to have it...that's worse then Rape.
That's just sixteen different kinds of @#*!ed up.
I just...I mean I kind of ASSUME that nobody is saying that anybody HAS to get an abortion whether they want it or not. But then why include Incest?
I don't get it. I. Just. Don't. Get. It.
I can see "slandering" you opponent with the distinction, but why would anybody include Incest as it's own separate category?
That's just dumb.
Dumb!
Bad @#*!ing language man...
One of the big "points" to the Presidential Election was Mitt Romney's stance on abortion.
Again and again we were hit with ads from Barack Obama and his supporters that Romney wanted to outlaw all abortions...even in the cases of Rape, Incest, or When the Mother's Life Is At Risk.
And then we got hit with ads from Romney and his ilk that said basically, "No no no! Mitt Romney is against abortion EXCEPT in the cases of Rape, Incest, or When the Mother's Life Is At Risk."
Now, to be absolutely clear here: I AM A MALE. I DO NOT HAVE A UTERUS OR ACCOMPANYING FEMALE GENITALIA. Which means that any thoughts or opinions I have about the topic of abortion are my own and are not to be taken as advocacy for any political: view, party or agency.
Now, as I understand it, one of the big objections to abortions is that people don't want abortion to be used as birth control. Meaning that instead of the pill or condoms or what have you, a woman has indiscriminate sex and just goes for a trip to the abortion clinic if she gets pregnant. I can see the point. It sounds like a logical argument to me. Abortion NOT being a primary form of birth control? Not a problem for me. (Ya know, as a concept. As I said, no uterus. Getting an abortion isn't something I have to worry about.)
So here's my thing. I'm Not Pro-Life. I'm also not Pro-Choice. If I'm anything, I'm Pro-Language. And both the charge against Romney and his campaign's response have some Bad. @#*!ing. Language.
There seem to be three (3) categories of abortions that are to be considered "okay". 1) Rape. 2) Incest. 3) When the Mother's Life Is At Risk. Pro-whatever, those three situations are times when an abortion is "alright" (Ya know, in general. There are always the Pro-Life fanatics who say, "No Abortions Ever" but I'm just dealing with the Moderates and the "Choice" crowd.)
So, let's take a look at those three categories.
1) Rape. Now I think all reasonable peoples will agree that any woman who has had Unconsensual Sex That Results In Pregnancy should be allowed to get an abortion. Actually, I think all reasonable people would agree that any woman who has had Unconsensual Sex That Results In Pregnancy should get therapy, a hug and a cookie. Maybe two hugs... Rape is Bad. Let me say that again, Rape is Bad. One more time, for the people in the cheap seats, RAPE IS BAD! Nobody should EVER be forced to have Unconsensual Sex. Ever. And in the unfortunate case where a woman is forced to have Unconsensual Sex That Results In Pregnancy, I think forcing her to carry to term and then deliver a child that she had no choice in conceiving is pretty @#*!ing Evil. Just about as Evil as forcing the conception in the first place.
So you get raped, you get knocked up, you wanna abort? No problem.
2) Incest...let me get back to you.
3) When the Mother's Life Is At Risk. This one is, in my view, another "no-brainer." Kid'll live but Mom is toast? Again, I think all reasonable peoples would agree that forcing a woman to basically commit suicide for the sake of her unborn child is Evil. It's a tragedy to be sure. Another one of those therapy, a hug and a cookie situations. But another instance where a woman should be allowed to have an abortion.
So to recap: abortions for Rape victims and for When the Mother's Life Is At Risk. Perfectly reasonable. Perfectly logical.
And that brings me back to:
2) Incest. See...here's my problem. We've already established that Rape means you can get an abortion. It doesn't matter WHO commits the Rape. If a woman is Raped, she can have the abortion. Right? We're all on the same page?
So why is Incest on the list?
I mean I understand that Incest is wrong. Check that, Wrong. But if we accept the premise that abortion shouldn't be used as birth control, and we ALSO accept the premise that Unconsensual Sex That Results In Pregnancy (Rape,) is a situation where an abortion is tolerable, then why are we talking about Incest?
Rape is already on the list. A woman gets Raped by her father, it's still Rape. (And Wrong.) So any pregnancy that resulted is covered. Why specifically call out pregnancies that are the result of close blood relatives getting it on?
A woman has sex with her brother. She's not Raped by her brother. She CHOOSES to have sexual intercourse with her male sibling. She gets knocked up. Why is her abortion okay? The lady down the street who slept with some random (non-relative) guy and got pregnant (which won't kill her,) can't get an abortion.
(Presuming that either the Supreme Court overturns Roe V. Wade, or a new law is passed that the only abortions that are acceptable are the Romney Trilogy of: Rape, Incest, or When the Mother's Life Is At Risk.)
I mean if we (as a society) say "That the only choice when it comes to abortion is choose a different form of birth control or choose not to have sex." Why is there a special group that gets to choose to have sex and still gets abortions?
WTF?
That makes NO sense to me. "We're gonna make it so that only a tiny unfortunate minority of women can have abortions, oh and the kinky freaks." Where's the logic?
If a woman CHOOSES to have sex with a close blood relative and her pill didn't work, or the condom broke, or their "rhythm" was off, or whatever... why should she get access to an abortion when another woman who had the same incident with a Non-relative can't?
I just don't get it.
I mean, sure, a woman is the unfortunate victim of an incestuous Rape. She gets knocked up. Yeah, I think she should have no trouble getting an abortion. Because she was RAPED. Not because it was Incest. WHO Raped her shouldn't come into it. Rape is Wrong and no woman should be forced to have the kid. But don't tell me that "we're gonna eliminate abortion as birth control" and then say "unless you and your relative choose to get nasty."
Bull$&*^!
Unless... Are we FORCING the women who choose to bang their uncles to get abortions?
I mean that...that... What the @#*!
I mean if you take it as a fundamental principle that abortions are bad things that should only happen in extreme circumstances, to then say that one of those circumstances is a time when the woman getting the abortion doesn't get to choose to have it...that's worse then Rape.
That's just sixteen different kinds of @#*!ed up.
I just...I mean I kind of ASSUME that nobody is saying that anybody HAS to get an abortion whether they want it or not. But then why include Incest?
I don't get it. I. Just. Don't. Get. It.
I can see "slandering" you opponent with the distinction, but why would anybody include Incest as it's own separate category?
That's just dumb.
Dumb!
Bad @#*!ing language man...
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
An Open Letter to George Luca...oh wait a minute
So I was all ready to give my thoughts on the Disney/Lucasfilm merger, when I started to think about Star Wars.
I mean really think about Star Wars.
REALLY think.
Okay.
So in Star Wars (Episode 4, "A New Hope", the one from 1977, whatever...) Luke Han and Chewie go and rescue Leia from the detention block on the Death Star.
And it goes tits up pretty fast and they're screwed.
And Leia's bright idea is to shoot the cover off an access shaft to a trash compactor.
And when they all get down in the compactor, a monster tries to eat Luke.
Everybody remember that?
Good. Here's my thing: how did the monster get into the trash compactor?
...
Yeah, you can see where this is headed right?
Let's look at the facts.
The Death Star is an artificial space station. It was BUILT. So for the trash compactor monster to be in the trash compactor, it had to have gotten there because someone wanted it to be there.
Who?
The Empire? Why? Does it eat trash? Is the trash compactor monster some kind of "green" waste reduction scheme put in place to placate Gungan demands?
Doubtful. It DID try to EAT Luke remember. Why would a waste eating scavenger try to eat the one thing that's moving in a sea of otherwise "easy pickings"?
Which leaves the only other reason I can think of: it's some kind of security protocol to prevent prison escapes. You break out of your cell, pry open the cover and slide down into a pool of waste and it eats you.
Again, doubtful. Why would the Empire have a carnivorous beast in an out of the way location when it's troops are supposed to be the best of the best and stop any escape attempt before it happens. What do they do then? Just send random Imperials down to feed it?
So then how'd it get there?
Was it there by accident?
Did somebody buy it as a pet when it was small and flush it when it got too big? Like the legendary alligators in the New York sewer system?
And if it got flushed, then who flushed it?
And that's when it hit me. Some kid.
The Death Star is a big ass place. And it was designed as a long term space station. Guys stationed there are there for years. So maybe they have families. Ya know that stormtrooper that clunks his head on the door of the control room when they bust in and find R2 and 3PO? Maybe he's got a wife and 2.3 kids. And maybe Junior got a pet monster at some sleazy spaceport before he got shipped off to Dad's new post. And Mom flushed it when she found out. And so "Fluffy" just swam around the Death Star's sewage system eating organic trash and growing until one day this twerp in shiny white armor steps on it and it strikes.
Which is a truly terrifying idea if you think about it.
Not the twerp in armor thing, the idea of stormtroopers having kids.
Because Luke blew up the Death Star.
And everybody on board died.
EVERYBODY.
Which means if stormtroopers have families then those families on the Death Star died too.
And Luke Skywalker killed them.
That's right, Luke Skywalker, Hero of the Rebellion...is a Baby Killer.
I mean really think about Star Wars.
REALLY think.
Okay.
So in Star Wars (Episode 4, "A New Hope", the one from 1977, whatever...) Luke Han and Chewie go and rescue Leia from the detention block on the Death Star.
And it goes tits up pretty fast and they're screwed.
And Leia's bright idea is to shoot the cover off an access shaft to a trash compactor.
And when they all get down in the compactor, a monster tries to eat Luke.
Everybody remember that?
Good. Here's my thing: how did the monster get into the trash compactor?
...
Yeah, you can see where this is headed right?
Let's look at the facts.
The Death Star is an artificial space station. It was BUILT. So for the trash compactor monster to be in the trash compactor, it had to have gotten there because someone wanted it to be there.
Who?
The Empire? Why? Does it eat trash? Is the trash compactor monster some kind of "green" waste reduction scheme put in place to placate Gungan demands?
Doubtful. It DID try to EAT Luke remember. Why would a waste eating scavenger try to eat the one thing that's moving in a sea of otherwise "easy pickings"?
Which leaves the only other reason I can think of: it's some kind of security protocol to prevent prison escapes. You break out of your cell, pry open the cover and slide down into a pool of waste and it eats you.
Again, doubtful. Why would the Empire have a carnivorous beast in an out of the way location when it's troops are supposed to be the best of the best and stop any escape attempt before it happens. What do they do then? Just send random Imperials down to feed it?
So then how'd it get there?
Was it there by accident?
Did somebody buy it as a pet when it was small and flush it when it got too big? Like the legendary alligators in the New York sewer system?
And if it got flushed, then who flushed it?
And that's when it hit me. Some kid.
The Death Star is a big ass place. And it was designed as a long term space station. Guys stationed there are there for years. So maybe they have families. Ya know that stormtrooper that clunks his head on the door of the control room when they bust in and find R2 and 3PO? Maybe he's got a wife and 2.3 kids. And maybe Junior got a pet monster at some sleazy spaceport before he got shipped off to Dad's new post. And Mom flushed it when she found out. And so "Fluffy" just swam around the Death Star's sewage system eating organic trash and growing until one day this twerp in shiny white armor steps on it and it strikes.
Which is a truly terrifying idea if you think about it.
Not the twerp in armor thing, the idea of stormtroopers having kids.
Because Luke blew up the Death Star.
And everybody on board died.
EVERYBODY.
Which means if stormtroopers have families then those families on the Death Star died too.
And Luke Skywalker killed them.
That's right, Luke Skywalker, Hero of the Rebellion...is a Baby Killer.
Friday, October 26, 2012
Why? Because we like you...
Hi! Here's a little number I wrote back in 2000 when Dinosaurs still roamed the Earth and you were still just a twinkle in your father's eye (What? It could've happened...):
The Afterlife
a short play by Matt Dow
Copyright 2000 by Matt Dow
a subsidy of Dave and Betsy Dow since 1979
Cast:
Jack...........................................................................................The dearly departed
Mrs. Smith................................................................................The grieving mother
Madam Grace.....................................A world renowned Medium (part time large)
Megan....................................................................The departed's sister (a believer)
William................................................................The departed's brother (a skeptic)
Roberts......................................................Mrs Smith's butler (and another skeptic)
Scene one: the Smith home. It is the third anniversary of Jack Smith's death. His mother, brother, sister, and the world renowned medium (and part time large) Madam Grace have gathered to try and speak to Jack in the afterlife. As the curtain lifts Megan and William are talking FRONT STAGE LEFT
WILLIAM: Megan, I can't believe you're encouraging mother with this psychic nonsense. It's ridiculous, this Madam Grace is nothing but a fraud.
MEGAN: You mustn't say that William, Madam Grace is world renowned. Besides Mother needs this, it's closure. You know poor Jack's death in that car crash shook her to no end.
Mrs. Smith and Madam Grace enter from STAGE RIGHT followed by Roberts. Roberts is carrying a small table.
MRS. SMITH: Oh thank you for coming Madam Grace. It is an honor to have a medium of your stature in my home.
ROBERTS (to audience): And it's amazing the home can withstand her stature.
MADAM GRACE: If we speak to Jack, then the honor is mine Mrs. Smith.
Roberts places the table FRONT STAGE CENTER and starts to gather five chairs, William and Megan help.
MADAM GRACE: Please tell me a little about Jack.
MRS. SMITH: Oh, he was a wonderful boy, played track in college. Went all the way to the nationals. His coach thought he could have been an Olympian if he hadn't... If he hadn't... hadn't...Oh Jack (starts crying).
Megan comes over and she and Madam Grace comfort Mrs. Smith as William and Roberts finish getting ready by turning down lights.
MADAM GRACE: There there now Mrs. Smith, in all the years I've been a medium I've reunited hundreds of people with their loved ones on the other side.
MRS. SMITH: Oh Madam Grace do you really think you can help me contact my Jack?
MADAM GRACE: Of course I do Mrs. Smith. Now if everyone is ready Please sit around the table and join hands.
Everyone sits around the table in the following order: Megan, Mrs. Smith, Madam Grace, William, and Roberts Leaving a space so the audience can see all of them.
MADAM GRACE: I shall begin. I beg ye, oh mystic voices of the cosmos, help us to contact one who has departed the mortal plane three years hence. Please help us to contact Jack Smith, oh great and wise benefactors I beg of thee. Ohwha!
EVERYONE (after a little prompting from Madam Grace): Ohwha!
MADAM GRACE: Tafoo!
EVERYONE:Tafoo!
MADAM GRACE: Liam!
EVERYONE: Liam!
MADAM GRACE (pretending to go into a trance): Ooooommmmm. Ooooooommmmmm.
Ooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Jack Smith can you hear me?
From off stage THE GHOSTLY VOICE OF JACK SMITH:Yes.
Everyone is shocked, especially Madam Grace, she was faking it.
MRS. SMITH:Jack? Son is that you?
JACK (less ghostly): Yes mother.
MADAM GRACE:Jack will you speak to us?
JACK (his voice is almost normal now): Yes.
MRS. SMITH: Oh Jack what is it like on the other side?
JACK (his voice is totally normal now): Dark.
MEGAN: You mean a bleak world of black and white, full of shadow and totally depressing beyond all human understanding?
JACK: No, it's dark, as in no light. The opposite of bright, ya know, dark.
MRS. SMITH: Oh Jack have you seen God?
JACK: Yes.
WILLIAM: What did he look like?
JACK: He had a flashlight.
MRS. SMITH: Did he say anything to you?
JACK: I couldn't really hear him and he was walking away from me, and when I started to follow I tripped.
WILLIAM: You tripped?
JACK: Yeah, it happens a lot.
MRS. SMITH: Jack, I recently found out that I'm going to die in the next six months, is there anything I can do to prepare myself for the afterlife?
JACK: Yeah, bring matches.
WILLIAM (mockingly): Because it's dark?
JACK: No, a couple of the other guys are smokers, and they dropped their matches.
WILLIAM: I find that a little hard to believe.
JACK: It's true, in fact most of the guys I've met are smokers, unfortunately they didn't bring cigarettes or matches.
MADAM GRACE: Jack have you met anyone famous? Like a Philosopher or something?
JACK: I think I might have bumped into Elvis.
WILLIAM: Elvis?
JACK: Yeah, I bumped into this guy and when I apologized he said, "Not a problem" he had a southern accent and was kinda fat, plus a few days later he sang a pretty good "Blue Suede Shoes".
MADAM GRACE: Have you met anyone else? Someone with a message for the world of the living maybe?
JACK: No, not really. Like I said, it's pretty dark.
ROBERTS: Master Jack, are you trying to say that the entire afterlife is some big, dark room where everyone walks around bumping into each other?
JACK: Well, yeah. Pretty much.
MEGAN: Jack I need to know...
JACK (interrupting her): Listen I gotta go. Mom, I'll see you when you get here, er, I mean I'll feel around for you when you get here. It was nice talking to everybody. Bye.
MRS. SMITH: Jack, Jack are you there?
MADAM GRACE: No, I'm afraid the connection has been severed.
WILLIAM: I just don't believe it. Dark?
MEGAN: That's what he said.
ROBERTS: Hey we learned one thing.
MADAM GRACE: Oh really, what's that?
ROBERTS: Elvis is dead.
Curtain closes.
There ya go. If any of you theatrical types wanna put on a show all I ask is that you include my name and the copyright information. (Posting pictures and video online is also appreciated.) (And large sacks of money are too.)
Saturday, October 13, 2012
So...what's happening...
In which I run down where Mouse Skull Entertainment is...
Let's see, what's the state of the union:
- Racecar Comics issue #6 is drawn and ready to be printed. The idea is to do it as "Print Upon Request" where I'll print only when I have enough orders to justify going to the copy store. This issue will probably have a Dave Sim variant cover, but I gotta figure out how I wanna run that. Buy four get one free? Just pay extra for the variant? I dunno, that gets tied up in...
- The Official Mouse Skull Entertainment Seventh Annual "Going Out Of Style" Sale. Which at this point is pretty pathetic since I'm pretty sure issue #4 of Racecar comics is the only issue I have on hand. All the other issues are out of print (mainly because I usually only print 25 copies,) and I don't know if I wanna print up a bunch or convert them all to "Print Upon Request".
- Isssue #7 of Racecar comics is "plotted" and the first few pages are drawn. At this point, it's getting time to draw and figuring out if I'm headed where I think I am.
- The 2012 Christmas Card is also "plotted" and I just need to make the time.
- glamourpuss #25/zootanapuss #4 is out there and available from your better comic shops and online stores.
I also have the copies Dave Sim sent me which are tied up in the "Going Out Of Style" Sale. I need to write out the Bonus "Making of glamourpuss #25/zootanapuss #4 page 10" booklet I want to include with them. More time, ugh...
- Let's see... I still need to do the "Iguana VS Beer Origin Issue" of Racecar comics and use the pages Jeff Tundis did for me...YEARS AGO
- Oh, and I'm thinking about doing a Kickstarter for my old webcomic "Action Figures Inc.", but I gotta talk to the Art-Monkey to see if he wants to upgrade all the old strips and then see how much a nice book will cost to get printed.
So that's where I'm at. Thoughts?
Sunday, October 7, 2012
And now:
THE OLD "PLUGOLA"
So Talented Writer/Artist and my Occasional Acquaintance and Pseudo-Boss* Dave Sim:
Seen here practicing his infamous "James Dean" impersonation
is currently gearing up for the release of HIGH SOCIETY AUDIO DIGITAL over at http://www.cerebusdownloads.com/ and is looking to plug that as much as possible. To wit, he wants to get "The Paragraph" in the eyes of everybody he can:
HIGH SOCIETY AUDIO DIGITAL, the graphic novel project that raised $63,000 on Kickstarter in June to finance its conversion to A/D (Audio Digital) format is almost here. Graphic novelist Dave Sim brings his classic best-selling black and white 1982 graphic novel (FIVE STARS in most graphic novels guides) to life reading all of the narration AND performing the voices of his entire cast of dozens of characters. All 500 pages have been digitally remastered from the original artwork, original negatives and reconstructions (the original negatives for 130 pages were destroyed in an apartment fire in August). The first 20-page installment is a FREE download starting October 10 at www.cerebusdownloads.com. VIEW "TRAILER" AT http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/189735833/cerebus-high-society-special-audio-visual-digital FOR A SMALL TASTE OF THIS AWESOME PROJECT
He's got a five minute preview up at www.cerebusdownloads.com right now.
So download the preview, love it, and spread the word, and on the tenth, get the FREE first issue, That's right, I said FREE.
Who doesn't love FREE stuff?
Commies, that's who.
Don't be a Commie.
Get HIGH SOCIETY AUDIO DIGITAL today! Er...I mean on October 10th.
*I mean I worked with him on glamorpuss #25
Which you should go buy too.
Welcome!
Hello, and WELCOME to the OFFCIAL Mouse Skull Entertainment Blog!
(Not to be confused with the absoulute crap knock-off Mouse Skull Entertainment Blogs.)
((You can tell it's a knock-off if the humor is sub-par and 90% of the jokes are variation's of Yakov Smirnoff's "what a country" bit.))
I'm Matt Dow, President and only employee.
Let the entertainments begin:
What A Country!?!
(Not to be confused with the absoulute crap knock-off Mouse Skull Entertainment Blogs.)
((You can tell it's a knock-off if the humor is sub-par and 90% of the jokes are variation's of Yakov Smirnoff's "what a country" bit.))
I'm Matt Dow, President and only employee.
Let the entertainments begin:
What A Country!?!
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